Love is in the air: USD couples reflect on relationships

From students to faculty, USD couples are spending this Valentine’s Day in love. Balance, having common interests and communicating are important values to the couples featured below.

Lexi Beesley &  Tommy Tran

Sophomore Lexi Beesley and junior Tommy Tran met when they were around 12. The couple didn’t start talking until they were in their early college years, however.

“The summer before my freshman year, I knew he was going (to USD) and he was one of the only people I personally knew that was going to be here,” Beesley said. “So, we started talking through school.”

The couple has been dating for around a year and seven months. Beesley said she initiated the relationship.

“After I saw Tommy at his parent’s (nail) salon, I was really interested in him,” she said. “We had grown up, we were practically adults at the time.”

Beesley and Tran said they like doing “geeky” things together, like “binge-watching Youtube videos,” playing video games, playing with their dog Luna, doing wedding videography and traveling together.

Tran said his favorite thing about Beesley is her independence and self-drive.

“She’s super self-motivated,” he said. “I think she makes the relationship more comfortable to be in.”

Beesley said her favorite thing about Tran is his optimism.

“Tommy is so positive sometimes it almost grosses me out,” she said. “Tommy never really gets negative or pessimistic at all. He’s always wanting to go the next step or challenge himself two times harder.”

A fond memory they share is during one of their first dates before they were an official couple they sat at a Taco Bell, talking for hours.

“Then we just ended up sitting in her car and talked for a lot longer, too,” Tran said.

Beesley said the best way to remain in a healthy relationship is communication and being free of social media influence which is also the first point that is being quoted in any couples counselling sessions.

“If you have to debate whether or not to tell your significant other something for whatever reason… then you’re not in a relationship for the right reasons,” she said. “Spending real time together is important, and seeking guidance from an Empathi therapist can provide valuable insights and support in fostering open communication and understanding within the relationship.”

Honesty and appreciating the little moments are the most imperative things in their relationship, Tran said. If you’re struggling with communication in your relationship, consider going to couples therapy sutherland shire.

“That’s what makes our relationship so strong,” Tran said. “We can literally sit down with each other, have a face-to-face conversation and not go stale. We’re not focusing on anything else except the other person and just trying to enjoy ourselves.”

Dana Southerland & Kris Knisely

Assistant French professor Kris Knisely and school of education adviser Dana Southerland met in Paris, France, when Knisely was teaching there in the summer and Southerland was on a trip. The couple is getting married in May after being together for three years.

“It feels like we’re married already,” Southerland said.

The couple said they love to cook, eat and travel. They share a lot of the same things, but have “healthy differences,” Knisely said.

“I’m the type of person who likes to be alone, but she’s the only person who I’d rather spend time with than spending time alone,” Knisely said.

Southerland said she likes how much they have in common.

“Everyone jokes that we’re the same person,” Southerland said.

The couple remained in contact after spending time in Paris and then being apart for awhile.

“I went on this trip with a totally different mindset. I was like, ‘All right, this is going to be the summer, the year for me. I’m not trying to see anyone, not trying to meet anyone, I’m just trying to be alone,’” Knisely said. “Then I met her and I was like, ‘Oh, man. That’s out of the water.’”

When coming to work at USD together, Southerland said she “needed a change,” and Knisely liked USD. They said they like working together as educators.

“It’s nice that we are so close to work,” Southerland said. “It’s nice to be able to talk about work and collaborate on ideas.”

Southerland and Knisely said their favorite memories together are spending time cooking, traveling and sharing little moments.

Knisely said separating work from their relationship is important at times.

“Being clear when it’s work time and when it’s home time and not let those blend into each other,” Knisely said. “That’s one of the great things about our relationship. Selfishly for me, Dana is so good about separating work and life.”

Southerland said balance is key for a healthy relationship.

“You cherish the quality time you spend together,” Southerland said. “Authenticity, transparency and being honest with ourselves and being with someone just makes us so much stronger.”

Maria Brady & Grant MacDonald

Sophomore Maria Brady said long distance relationships can be strong with the right person.

She and her boyfriend, Grant MacDonald, have been dating for about a year. MacDonald is from Perth, Australia, Brady from Omaha, Nebraska.

Brady and MacDonald met at USD during a welcome event last year.

“Someone from my floor was leading Grant around, using him as an intro to the conversation,” Brady said. “Instead of asking him about why he was here and what he was studying. I asked him whether or not Grizzly bears were better than panda bears. That carried on a conversation of absolute ridiculousness.”

Brady said she’s “wholeheartedly in love” with MacDonald.

“I realized that within a couple weeks of knowing him, and that absolutely terrified me,” she said. “In high school, I was always focused on academics and getting to college. My plan for college was to do the same thing. After spending that first semester with him, there’s no way that I want to spend my life without him. Even if that means changing up my plan a little bit.”

MacDonald is back in Australia, but Brady said he visited her over Christmas break. She also spent three months visiting him in Perth last summer. Besides that, the couple regularly Skypes to keep in touch.

Brady said a quality she admires is MacDonald’s care for others.

“Even if he encounters a difficulty with another person, he’s more focused on their well-being than his own,” she said.

Brady said communication is essential to keep their long distance relationship healthy.

“The ability to still get to hear his voice, to communicate with him daily is more than I could ask for,” she said. “Distance is definitely not for the faint of heart, but it’s a worth enough challenge if it’s with the right person… any amount of distance is difficult. But if it’s with the right person, it doesn’t seem as daunting.”