Let’s face it — nothing is worse than a school parking lot. The vast labyrinth of vehicles is a sour, foreign change from our driveways at home, and the area full of rubber, metal and anarchy can be hard to navigate.
North Complex parking is no different, and it’s easy to feel bitter having to walk 400 yards to the dorms after making a Hy-Vee run.
Luckily, I have some tips and guidelines to help students feel better about the organized chaos of our parking lot.
- Front row spots are a commodity, and will be treated as such.
If, by the graces of God, a parking spot is found closest to the hall’s doorway, it’s now the owner’s most valuable possession. Forget about Grandpa’s Rolex or a Chia Pet — the space between those two painted lines facing the hall takes priority over everything else.
- Plan five to 10 minutes to the end of a trip for finding a parking spot.
Remember, a trip doesn’t end once the parking lot is reached. If a great song begins to play as I’m pulling in, I know I have plenty of time to jam through its entirety. Searching for a spot in North Complex’s lot adds a few minutes to an excursion, so account for the extra time weaving through the rows before running late to a post-lunch lecture.
- Legal action can be taken against anyone who takes up two parking spaces.
If a person decides to use multiple parking spots for their vehicle, any part of their car not inside the designated lines is no longer theirs. So, if I walk to my car and realize my passenger mirror, doors and tires are missing, I’ll look down. I probably crossed the yellow line. If a student is afraid someone might door-ding their precious 2001 Chevrolet Impala, I don’t care. And neither does anyone. Please park in the lines.
- Bonus Tip: Exclusive parking
Sorry about that last one. To make up for my invasive tone, I’ll provide a helpful fact: It only costs $30 a day to park in the spaces in front of the “RESERVED FOR HALL DIRECTOR” signs. They’re conveniently located right outside the hall, and a receipt will appear under a windshield wiper after one to two hours. Be careful with the usage here, though. Any car may disappear if it is parked here too often.
- Cars can hurt humans.
We are students, scholars. We have goals and dreams, and we will do whatever it takes to reach our aspirations. We don’t have time for distractions, nonsense or waiting for cars to pass. So what do we do? We face them head on. College students are the only demographic willing to step out in front of a vehicle moving 25-30 mph, thinking a red light and a crosswalk can prevent them from being demolished. Even an offensive lineman cannot chop-block a 2-ton rolling hunk of steel. Whether it be Cherry St. or the parking lot, be careful, kids.
The blacktop maze can be frustrating, I know. But if we stay mindful and courteous, we can keep our parking lot a nice, clean place to go when an inebriated student pulls the fire alarm.