IN THE KNOW: The business school bringing authority on forgery and embezzlement and famous former confidence man Frank Abagnale to Aalfs Auditorium on April 16. Could prove to be a very interesting event. Catch it if you can. IN THE DARK: March Madness. No Cinderellas in the Final Four. Brace yourselves for a less-than-thrilling conclusion. […]

“My mom didn’t start shrinking until 60.” — Al Neuharth Media Center “He wasn’t that hard.’” -“That’s what she said.” — Old Main “She was hungry and mine smelled better than hers, so I let her dive in.” — I.D. Weeks Library “My microwave is a doorway to hell.” — Akeley Lawrence “I don’t trust […]

in the know & in the dark IN THE KNOW: March Madness upsets. It’s refreshing and exciting to know that any team truly has a shot of winning on any given day. IN THE DARK: Busted brackets. As fun as those upsets are though, it’s not like many people had Norfolk State beating Missouri. IN […]

Here you’ll find the weirdest, funniest and stupidest things that we’ve heard during the week. Context is for suckers. “I don’t like curb-stomping. It’s too messy.” — Al Neuharth Media Center “We shall procreate our own economy.’” — East Hall “Guinea pigs. Very cute. Very tasty.” — Beacom School of Business “Michael Bay, keep your […]

IN THE KNOW: Spring Break. Only a few more days until we can ignore all our work and live carefree. It’s basically the same as now, just with a really fun title.   IN THE DARK: The weather, once again. Every week it teases us with nice weather and we start to peel off the […]

“If you want it, just tell me to pull it out.” -North Complex   “Sometimes when I’m bored I text a random person and say, ‘I buried the body, now what?’” – North Complex parking lot   “Because, you know, selling cookies is communism.” – Al Neuharth Media Center   “She got a little excited […]

IN THE KNOW: Scholarship weekend coming up. It’s a time for the university to start recruiting some bright new minds. IN THE DARK: The looming threat of midterms. There’s really no funny quip for midterms, they’re far too unpleasant. IN THE KNOW: It’s only of couple weeks until Spring Break, a week full of relaxing […]

“That’s biologically impossible unless I invent a time machine somewhere down the line and go back in time and sleep with your mother for some reason.” – Old Main “You put belly button lint in my hair? Now I’m going to put poop in yours.” -“How is that anywhere near the same?” – NORTH COMPLEX […]

IN THE KNOW: The victory over South Dakota State University. It can’t get much better than beating the Jacks. IN THE DARK: The return of the snow. It’s like in a horror movie – every time we think you’re dead and gone, you jump back up and rear your ugly head. IN THE KNOW: The […]

“Until you sign a contract, you can still pull out.” – North Complex “Hip pop; it’s the music of the elderly.” – Coyote Village “It’s better than sex, Subway and Saturdays combined.” – The Commons “We just need to throw in a Bible and we’re good.” – The Volante Office “Dude, I heard you can […]