College provides a way to look at sex

College is supposed to be a time of learning and self-discovery. Besides attending classes and gaining academic knowledge, it is an introduction to adult life.

Sex is one of those aspects of life that people do not converse about openly. However, college is a time when many people have their sexual awakening. It is only fair that someone brings the issue into acceptable social conversation.

It is important to first establish your own moral principles about sex. For some, that means you want to refrain from all sexual activity until marriage. And I applaud people who believe that and would insist that it should be important for you to stick to those guns. For others, you may believe it is time to discover your own sexual bounds, but I would insist that it is just as important for you to develop credence of what you are and are not willing to do.

First and foremost, if you are going to have sex, you need to be aware of all the risks. I know most have had some sort of guidance on birth control and sexually transmitted infection prevention, but there are other risks of sex that are not always brought to light. Sex changes the dynamics of a relationship no matter what. Having sex with an individual will either bring you closer together or push you farther apart. I wish I could explain why, but all I know from personal experience is sex complicates things no matter how much you wish it wouldn’t.

The best advice for someone engaging in sexual activity is to be open and honest about everything with the person(s) you’re going to engage with. These are somewhat simple steps, but because of the awkwardness associated with the topic people generally refrain from the subject. However, it is a simple conversation that is well worth overcoming the difficulties for the mutual assurance.

First, ask and tell the person do you have any STIs and when was the last time you were tested. If you are going to be sexually active, regular testing is vital, even if you take preventative measures. Furthermore, you can get an STI test from student health at a very reduced cost. This is one of the many costs of being a good sexual partner that people do not always discuss.

Second, have a conversation concerning birth control. Which methods do parties engage in and what are the preferences of all parties involved? I understand this seems like a moot point for same-sex partners, but what sort of STI preventatives you will use is also important.

Third, clearly discuss each other’s sexual limitations and boundaries and then abide by them. No one likes a pushy partner. Feel free to discuss or propose other options and activities but once someone has clearly said, “no,” it is your responsibility to respect those personal choices.

Sex is a great thing. Studies have shown that it has very good effects on people’s health and demeanor. But it is a decision that needs to be approached with an adult mindset. Be safe, be smart, do not hesitate to consult a professional and do not do anything you are not ok with.