The ‘American Dream’ shouldn’t dictate life choices
For many generations getting married after attending college, working at a job and having many children has been portrayed as the “American Dream.”
People my age are planning their weddings, thinking about how many kids they want and anticipating finding a job that will make their dreams come true after first suffering in college.
Admittedly, I would think that if I had none of these things — kids, college degree, marital status or job — I would be doing something wrong, too. But now that I think about it, those are not the most important things in life.
Going to college, for example, is not everyone’s cup of tea. Not everyone wants to wallow in a huge pile of debt when they’re finished and some people might have a hard time finding jobs. It’s not necessary to attend college, but it seems there is a societal pressure to attend it anyway.
College is not for everyone, therefore no one should feel the need is necessary. I chose college on my own terms, but that doesn’t mean someone else needs to go to school. There are plenty of opportunities available without college, so by all means, if there is one, take it.
Another thing is that marriage is becoming less popular, according to the Huffington Post. There are risk factors everywhere, including the possible or inevitable divorce, financial problems and even mental and physical health.
While marriage is a bond between two people who love each other, it is an expensive bond, and overall, if a couple were to divorce, there may be legal trouble and more stress. You should hire a divorce lawyer to assist and guide you throughout this process.
People can choose to get married all they want, but it should not be jammed into their heads as being the imperative route to success. Marriage is also a serious commitment which a lot of people probably don’t want.
I have experienced downfalls of marriages, and that has also ruined it for me, because it simply doesn’t seem like a joyous time anymore.
Being tied down to marriage doesn’t seem like much fun, despite being with the person you love. There are more negatives than positives, so it never seemed like much enjoyment. Being in a committed relationship seems much more manageable, without the horrendous legal problems if a couple were to break up, or financial problems if the couple were to live together. Then there are also questions like “How is alimony calculated?” when going through a divorce which can also complicate things if you don’t have a lawyer.
Finally, if people decide not to have children, it’s okay. People’s opinions of children differ, but I know for sure that a child is something I never want to have.
Women, for example, are asked when they’re going to have children, as if it is expected — married or not. People never realize the struggles that come with having children.
Babies are expensive, and they “suck the life out of you,” according to Karen Mangiacotti. She points out children are a hassle, and they are not meant for everyone. There is a pressure for people to have children, when really, people can do what they want if it benefits them.
Not having a child can make one feel more free, have their health in tiptop shape, have a better financial status and can lessen stress on an individual.
While children may be fun and dandy for many people, not everyone should feel the need to pop them out as soon as possible. I for one am hoping to not have children; therefore I can sit in my school debt peacefully without a baby to add onto that pile.
The ideal American Dream should not be about giving into societal pressure of going to college, having children and getting married. If people want to wait, or not do any of those things at all, why burden them?
