Opinion

Voting in elections is one of the only ways an average person can make a difference in the lives of their peers and themselves. Since our forefathers chose to create the United States of America in the image of a democracy so many years ago, voting has been best way to equalize each citizen. It […]

Dear Hypocrites, When I was in high school the teachers always told me a number of college stories that would make us rebellious kids sit still. Some of them include stories of truth and wisdom like, don’t room with your best friend because you’ll end up hating them by the end of the year. Another […]

IN THE KNOW: Spring Break. Only a few more days until we can ignore all our work and live carefree. It’s basically the same as now, just with a really fun title.   IN THE DARK: The weather, once again. Every week it teases us with nice weather and we start to peel off the […]

“If you want it, just tell me to pull it out.” -North Complex   “Sometimes when I’m bored I text a random person and say, ‘I buried the body, now what?’” – North Complex parking lot   “Because, you know, selling cookies is communism.” – Al Neuharth Media Center   “She got a little excited […]

Dear Reading Public, Last semester, I wrote to you about how frustrated I was that nothing ever seemed to be happening in Vermillion. I urged you to make some news. “Go out and do something exciting,” I wrote. Knowing what some people consider exciting, however, I added a note of caution: “Don’t … write a […]

IN THE KNOW: Scholarship weekend coming up. It’s a time for the university to start recruiting some bright new minds. IN THE DARK: The looming threat of midterms. There’s really no funny quip for midterms, they’re far too unpleasant. IN THE KNOW: It’s only of couple weeks until Spring Break, a week full of relaxing […]

“That’s biologically impossible unless I invent a time machine somewhere down the line and go back in time and sleep with your mother for some reason.” – Old Main “You put belly button lint in my hair? Now I’m going to put poop in yours.” -“How is that anywhere near the same?” – NORTH COMPLEX […]

IN THE KNOW: The victory over South Dakota State University. It can’t get much better than beating the Jacks. IN THE DARK: The return of the snow. It’s like in a horror movie – every time we think you’re dead and gone, you jump back up and rear your ugly head. IN THE KNOW: The […]

  To whom it may concern: Whose brilliant idea was it to close the Beede Bump on Saturdays? The Beede Bump, for those who don’t know, is closed on Friday evening at 2 p.m. and then opens up again Sunday evening at 5 p.m. Sunday! I’m not sure what people are thinking. “Oh, there’s no […]

“Until you sign a contract, you can still pull out.” – North Complex “Hip pop; it’s the music of the elderly.” – Coyote Village “It’s better than sex, Subway and Saturdays combined.” – The Commons “We just need to throw in a Bible and we’re good.” – The Volante Office “Dude, I heard you can […]