The book “50 Shades of Grey” has brought many people to believe their ideal relationship must include a handsome CEO whose sexual preferences include Bondage, Submission, Sadism and Masochism (BDSM), and this is dangerous because the book does not exemplify what a healthy, consensual relationship should look like.
To sum up, the book not only promotes a terrible example of what a BDSM relationship is, but it almost tells the readers what they need in a relationship, and what the author told in her story was anything but a romantic, agreeable relationship.
The book depicts the main perpetrator as a control-freak and potentially a stalker, and the narrator simply accepts it.
First off, a BDSM relationship needs to be approved by both parties — otherwise it is abusive. This was not illustrated in this book, because the male lead wants and receives only what he wants and does not consider a thought from the narrator.
Overall, this book depicts a stalking, possessive and overall, controlling relationship. As Carey Purcell from the Huffington Post put it, this relationship portrayal is walking on a fine line.
“After reading this book series, I am deeply afraid that this type of relationship will be viewed as the romantic ideal for women. And I consider that to be extremely dangerous,” Purcell said.
This is true because not only women, but anyone reading this book, will feel it is OK to be controlled and abused in a relationship just because it is in a popular novel.
Of course, non-consensual sex is rape, and the main character is forced upon many a time. Not only that, but her partner is always insisting she abide by his rules, and she must only be devoted to him. Being that there are two more books afterward (which I have not read), I can only imagine the more brutal instances that could go on.
Authors write to please themselves and their fandom, and I respect that being a writer myself, but stories like these send a misconstrued message to both the younger and older crowds who dream of a healthy relationship.
Henceforth, no one should feel obligated to their partner in this instance. They should not feel like they are being watched all the time, they should not feel the need to be at their side at all times and serve only them and they should not have to agree to everything they say. In such an instance, they need to report this kind of behavior.
I will acknowledge the fact that this book is fictional and the author has her own imagination, but I also do not enjoy how society idolizes the book and calls it an “erotic romance.”
Fiction should entertain people, not give them an example of what they should have, which in this case, is an abusive relationship. What people read and watch can affect them.
The University of South Dakota, for example, teaches through educational practices about the importance of reporting sexual misconduct, which is great because if someone is in a relationship such as this, then it is not a matter to sugar coat, and needs to be reported. USD is great for the no tolerance with sexual misconduct crimes, because they should not be taken lightly.
Overall, “50 Shades of Grey” is not a book for the faint of heart, and should only be viewed as fictitious, being that the readers should live independently from their partners and learn to stand up for themselves when such heinous sexual misconduct occurs.