BLOG: Baking

In a few weeks, I will be among the multitude of students taking the proficiency exam. As far as I can tell, the purpose of the proficiency exam is to make sure college has not in fact made you more stupid than you were when you first arrived.

While I’m sure I’ll be able to squeak by the typical testing categories — English, math, reading comprehension, etc. — if there is a surprise test section on basic life skills, I’m reasonably certain I am sunk. Here’s why:

Like most stories of an unnecessarily difficult task, it all started when I decided I wanted to do something nice for Valentine’s Day. I picked up a box of brownie mix from Wal-Mart, thinking naively the most difficult part of the process was done.

Then I got back to my room and realized I’d need more ingredients than were included in the box. It took a village to make these brownies: I borrowed vegetable oil from Krista, a mixing bowl from Nicole, a pan from Jenna and two eggs from Mac. The baking, though, fell to me.

I’d been up for almost 14 hours by the time I even started the baking process, which was just the first of several mistakes. The second mistake was leaving my first experience with the dorm stove until late the night before I’d planned to disperse the freshly baked treats.

In any case, I’d followed the directions on the box down to the letter, yet when I stuck the brownies with a knife to be sure they had cooked I discovered they were still raw. No problem, I thought, I’d only baked them for the minimum baking time, so I’ll just throw them back in the oven for another four minutes.

After about half an hour and several more knife holes in the still-doughy surface, I was stumped. Something was wrong, but what! Once more I opened the oven and reached inside, but my oven mitt slipped and I bumped the exposed skin on the oven grate. I braced for searing pain, but nothing happened. Then I noticed that as I stood bent over the open oven I wasn’t feeling any heat on my face.

I looked up. The stove light was off. I’m an idiot.

While I waited for the oven to preheat a second time I reevaluated my life. College, I decided, isn’t just about what you learn in your classes. It’s about what you learn through living on your own for the first time: how to ask for help, how to adapt to different situations and how to forgive yourself for being really, really dumb.