The Rant: Saying your correct college year

Dear people who simply can’t answer me when I ask how old they are,

“Well, technically, credit-wise I’m a junior.”

Don’t be that person. The person who, when you ask, “What year are you?” go on a long tangent about their many dual-credit classes from high school and how they’re so much smarter than the rest of the peasants who are on track. Listen–if it’s your first year on campus, you’re a freshman. If it’s your second year on campus, you’re a sophomore. No one gives a darn how many credits you have. You’re not “credit-wise” anything; you’re just graduating early. Nothing is more insulting than surviving a year of college to become a sophomore, and a freshman who hasn’t yet stomached MUC Dining goes around declaring that you are equals. And I know you won’t forget to set your Instagram bios that read “USD ’21” (with the inevitable paw print and coyote emojis) just to remind us one more time that you are superior. If I really wanted to know how many credits you have, I would hack into your transcripts and look for myself.

-Kelli Susemihl, Managing Editor, Junior (Credit-wise)